Smoke Free UK……excuse me while I roflmao and pmsl

Apparently the UK will be smoke free by 2032. I have a question on this.

Does this mean that the chemical plants and steelworks near my hometown will be closed down by then? We have those white plastic double glazed windows at home like alot of houses do in sunny ole blighty. Whenever it rains, the sills are always covered in small black particles that appear to magically appear from the sky. While it isnt exactly acid rain, it cannot be normal and I can only presume it comes from the near by works.

I am sure the people in charge there have all seen Erin Brokcovich and take whatever steps are necessary to avoid Julia Roberts making a hit film about them. My suspicion is that they work just under the thresholds until the weather turns stormy or the sun sets, then it is probably open season on pumping as much crap into the atmosphere while noone can see.

Of course the environment agency monitors all these things, so that couldn’t possibly happen.

The local council have published information in their very glossy marketing magazine that shows they are one of the greenest councils in Britain.

*cough cough*

It is heart warming to know that my council tax is being spent on glossy magazines that tell me how great they are, as opposed to wasting the money on things the local population think they need, like decent waste disposal services. Ho hum.

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